Just A Normal Post...

Let's see how normal this post can last.


So! I forgot to tell you I have a *new* laptop! Sheila is collecting dust somewhere...Huh....I wonder where she is collecting dust....


Anywho.


This one is named Leo!


Yay!


So yeah. That's all I had planned to say, but I guess I'll keep going for the sake of my BOREDOM.


Some people are so mean.  Am I right?


What is wrong with half of the world? Do we need to say rude, unnecessary things? And use such vulgar language?


NO! 


Here's a lesson: If you have a negative comment or a rude remark, then keep it to yourself.  


Now, knowing me, I have a closest full that's bursting at the hinges with mean criticisms I could spew at society. And do I?


Yes! I do!


But maybe it'd be better if I stopped. Like for example, I should stop calling the guy who I liked/like/whatever the hell I feel a dirty, rotten, heartless, rat-like, piggish, butt munching, stupid, ugly, charming, gay, beautiful, jerk. 


*Cough.


That's not quite nice....


Or another example: calling every annoying skank on Facebook (you know, the "like the pic, not the link" twit faces) an annoying skank.  Because they are probably insecure and need mental help.


I'm not very good at this. I'm sorry.


Nevermind this nonsense, topic change!


You know what I've been addicted to lately?


Twitter.


It's so cool because you can make it look pretty! 


I put an ocean wave as my background picture and and I have sea blues and greens as my font colors!  Also, I'm purposefully trying to have hardly any followers because I can tweet about whatever I want without people being offended or me worrying about what other people might think.  


There's too many people on Facebook for me. And it doesn't look as pretty and it's annoying compared to Twitter. Although, thinking of it, people piss me off on Twitter, too.  


I can't escape from the imbeciles. That's why I seclude myself more often than not.  I try to escape them, but they always find me.


Speaking of imbeciles.


Whose idea was it to take pitchforks and burn torches to run out every surrounding town's village idiot into my town?  


No, really.


Driving on my main road today was like being swept up in a horrible circus act with clowns zipping all around me in minivans and moving trucks.


YES. MOVING TRUCKS.


This big, dirty truck that I had been keeping my eye on for a long time (because I saw it stall in the middle of the road...YEAH KIND OF DANGEROUS) decides to pull out right in front of me.


And what is it with people talking on the cell phone?


HELLOOOO ANSWER THIS: WHY ARE YOU DRIVING 60 MPH WITH BOTH HANDS OFF THE FREAKING WHEEL? BECAUSE OMGSH DANNY TEXTED YOU AND YOU JUST HAVE TO TEXT BACK? Um, I don't think that's an excuse! It'll sound like a poor one when people try to explain your untimely croaking!


Enough of this.


Simply thinking of the main road I have to drive on everyday makes my right foot slam down on an invisible gas pedal.


No, no...I don't have road rage...


Not that much anyway.


Well, that's all I have in me for today. 


Signing out of this blog like yeah~
Gwen the Super Hero, over and out

Reasons For Why I Am Single

You know what sucks? 


Being single. Being single!


Yes, I said it twice for emphasis. EMPHASIS! 


Anywho.


Yep, I've been single my whole life. Can you believe it? Single for my ENTIRE LIFE.


Is this even normal? No, really. I think I may have a disease or a curse or "the ugly" as Patrick Star would put it. 


You don't understand though.  I have put a lot of thought into this.  And with that I have derived various reasons for why I have never had a boyfriend.  Let's tick them off.


1) I am writing a post on a blog about being single.


2) There is a bra in my sock drawer.


3) There is an empty bag of gummy bears in my room. Who eats a whole bag of gummy bears? Single people.


4) I still watch Disney movies


5) I get annoyed too easily with people


6) My eye twitches when I'm stressed


7) My left calf muscle has been spazing out for 20 min


8) I could use a shower right now....


9) I tell my dog all of my problems.


10) My room is hardly ever neat


11) This nail polish has been on my toes since October


12) I'm really devastated over the fact I will never be a Teen Titan


13) I'm just single and always will be. Let's face it, I'll be posting about my sad, sad life until my fingers grow cold.


14) That was depressing


15) Gouda cheese makes me too happy


16) I'm just asdjlajsdasl unable to explain how I feel most of the time. Yes, that random letter attack was intentional.


17) I'M JUST TOO WEIRD 


18) I like the word "just" way too much. And I use it too much. 


19) I despise couples. 


20) Some days, I love everyone. This is not one of those days.


21) My love life never will go the way I want it to


22) Oh wait - LOL - my bad, I don't have a love life.


23) What the eff is a love life anyway? Gosh.


24) I will be forever single


There you have it. A list of valid reasons for my singleness. Sigh. Huh, this was kinda depressing....I apologize. Happier posts will come again soon! I promise.


Signing out of this blog like yeah~
Gwen the Super Hero, over and out

Hey Ya

Hello! I haven't written a post in awhile!  So what have I been up to? Let's see.

I think I am destined to work in a library for the rest of my life!  I went from doing trivial volunteer work at my High School library to doing research work in...MY NEW SCHOOL'S LIBRARY! Well, it's college really.  The excellent news?  I am paid!  Granted it's minimum wage, but hey! it's money.

Other than that I have finished some final High School duties, such as graduating.  *Cue happy music*

"Ohhhhhhh YEAH! SO LONG RAT HOLE! I WON'T BE MISSIN' YA!" *Happy dances*

Good stuff.  

Don't worry (because I know you were all SO worried about my whereabouts), I'll be writing posts again soon.  In the meantime, I must continue saving the world.  It's time consuming, but alas! there are sad and unfortunate civilians crying out my name... 

See ya.

Signing out of this blog like yeah~

Gwen the Super Hero, over and out.

Hm. Spelt or Spelled? I'll Go With the Healthy Kind.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suzwkw0dYmM

Good song if you're sad.

Hi ;) 

Wow, it took me five minutes to figure out how to get a wink on that smiley face.

That's besides the point though. The point I'm about to make- the point of this blog - is that my novel progress has been SABOTAGED.

Not just that, but my hair is gross, I ate a bag of sour-patch kids just after I worked out, school started again which means this semester I have PE class every morning, "The Green Hornet" was completely awesome/funny/unrealistic, but the whole time I was distracted with calculating how much fatter I'd be after I consumed my sour-patch kids and mentally writing a review of the movie in my head, and my laptop has passed on to the other life so I am stuck with typing on THIS computer (and you can't tell which one it is but it SUCKS because it's in our family study where anyone can waltz right in and discover my blogging).

I use caps a lot. I apologize, but I feel like it is an effective tool in expressing my feelings.

Anyways, life has been sabotaging my writing as you can tell from the above tirade. Not to mention that my whole world is being sustained by this little chip-like object called a USB. All of my writing (and miscellaneous files) - from short stories to poems to one failed novel to one novel in progress to a picture of zebras- is on that chip thing. A pink chip.

And yes, I had to look up the spelling of miscellaneous on Google. Alas! I spelled it right.  And just then I typed the word 'spelt' instead of 'spelled.' You know why?! Because for the last few days I've been living on spelt bread- the bread people skip over in the grocery aisle because its the icky kind that falls to bits since it doesn't have white flour. Yeah, that kind. I suffer in the name of vanity.

Life, my friends (a.k.a. random people who stumbled upon my blog because Google is cruel and led you here) is a viable opponent in this world and it will constantly try to make you lose. Right now I'd say the score is:

ME: 2.5 pts

LIFE: 2.5 pts (in billions)

But I choose to play against life. That reminds me of a very good idea that was brought up in Eat.Pray.Love.

Here's the quote:

"A friend took me to the most amazing place the other day. It's called the Augusteum. Octavian Augustus built it to house his remains. When the barbarians came they trashed it a long with everything else. The great Augustus, Rome's first true great emperor. How could he have imagined that Rome, the whole world as far as he was concerned, would be in ruins. It's one of the quietest, loneliest places in Rome. The city has grown up around it over the centuries. It feels like a precious wound, a heartbreak you won't let go of because it hurts too good. We all want things to stay the same. Settle for living in misery because we're afraid of change, of things crumbling to ruins. Then I looked at around to this place, at the chaos it has endured - the way it has been adapted, burned, pillaged and found a way to build itself back up again. And I was reassured, maybe my life hasn't been so chaotic, it's just the world that is, and the real trap is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation."

Hm. Sounds a bit like a J.K. Rowling quote I've heard once (or a million times because she's my hero).

Not saying I'm in ruins, but my post just reminded me of this quote, and I hope you all learn something from it as I have.

I'll try to see the good in my laptop being mutilated. It gives me time to think of more ideas for my story, which allows me to avoid writer's block! The ruin of my laptop has led to the transformation of my story (in a good way).

Okay, Life, let's see the score now:

ME: 3 pts

LIFE: 2.5 pts (in billions)

Hey, wait. Spelling miscellaneous right earns me another point.

ME: 4 pts

Yay!

Bottom line is life is crazy, but it's necessary for- well, um, LIVING.

If you think life is unfair and too chaotic to handle, just remember this: Great people don't come in Betty Crocker boxes.

It's not like God reached into his holy kitchen cabinet and pulled out a box that says: Preheat Oven To 350 Degrees. Open Box. Pour Out Contents. Mix. Place In Oven. Bake For Awhile. *ding* Receive Great Person Of Importance.

No! All people are born, all people are unique and flawed, and all people have to go through crap on different levels. It's all about how we handle the obstacles thrown at us and how we arise from falling down to rock bottom.

Honestly, I haven't seen the worst of anything yet, but I will one day.

And honestly, I have no idea why I wrote this post. It's only purpose was to serve as a means to vent my feelings and to express my inner thoughts. Boring....sorry. I will post an interesting book review or a story about what's been going on with destroying my former APUSH teacher- soon, I promise. 

Bye for now.

Signing out of this blog like yeah~

Gwen the Super Hero, over and out.

PS

I'm reading The Hunger Games as of late! It is very interesting and the plot is the only thing that is keeping me reading it because I think so far the characters are flat and the writing too choppy. Hm, I think I smell a book review!!

Releasing Your Inner Super Hero and Eating Peanut Butter Cookies

Ka-PoWw!...Are you a super hero?

"Uhhhh- no.... Who are you? And why are you asking me such a random question....Please, don't steal my peanut butter cookies..." *Slips peanut butter cookie into mouth and munches slowly*

AHA! That's a trick question....

Everyone is!

"WHAT?! But my head was just dunked into a toilet today.....I'm no super hero."

Okay then, everyone except you!

See we all have this inner super hero...I swear we do.  Especially myself, and except that nerd above.

Now, you all know that I am one, but I'm discovering powers I never even knew I had before....

For example, today I kicked some major butt.  And saved some lives while I was at it, too.

I volunteer in this library at my school during my FREE period.  Yeah, just saying that it's my FREE period... A period where I can slack off and do nothing, but I choose the alternative. (Live above the influence!) I SACRIFICE....just saying...Hey! Super heroes make sacrifices....BAM! There's a bit of my inner hero....oh, and there's more.  Of course there is more...

As I was saying, at this library I catalog books.

"Vou are such a loser! Vat's vat vou do in your spare time?! Come 'ere, I vanna dunk your head in thees toilet..."

*Sweat sweat, Panic* "Please, wait!! Back off...I-I...I have a weapon!!!!!" *Points Mega Zappster 3.1 at Olga the Bully*

"Vhoa, Bubbushca...cheellz out....zaight zaight. I gotcha, eet's cool, eet's c-cool."

"Yeah." *Lowers beastly weapon down* "That's what I THOUGHT!"

*Olga runs away, when she's (or he, it was kinda hard to distinguish) out of sight, I point Mega Zappster 3.1 at book barcode*

Beep!

All in a day's work... 

YEAH, THAT'S AFFIRMATIVE! I have a beastly book scanner, and let me tell you, I kick some major book binding butt  with it (alliteration baby...).

Then I do all this MAGICAL stuff like organizing the books I zap with my zapster.  Oh yeah. Be jealous of the zapster.  It's even better than those lame grocery zapsters (those are Mega Zapster 2.1s...not nearly as cool as the 3.1)

With it I'm unstoppable.... that is until I get an emergency call....*Dramatic fade to school scene*

BRINNNNNNGGGG!

*GASP* "There's trouble down the hall in the auditorium where my next class is! If only I had an extension cord...."*sigh*

I shoot down the hall and scan the horizon. Hmm...there seems to be no monster in our midst.  What could the problem possibly be?

"Help...please, someone help...."

A cry for help! Coming from the auditorium!

I glide past civilians and push open the doors. The cry becomes louder- like a pigeon with a broken wing, or a hippo with a cavity- the cry is pathetic and hopeless.

"Help...I need help, please. Anybody?"  

I look around the area....ooooo my teacher is selling chocolate bars this class! I'll take one!!

"I FREAKIN' SAID HELP!"

Goodness....someone's panties are in a bunch now, aren't they?

"I need a pencil....please, anybody...."

Ugh. Really. That's your problem....so now I have to give up my pencil, for you? I don't even know you. What if you're a nose-picker, huh? Let me contemplate this.

"I need a pencil for this test! Please, guys just check if you have one. I really need one."

Oh geez. Don't look over here at me...don't ask me.....I'm not giving up my favorite mechanical pencil!!! NEVER!

"Please...I need one..."

The tension is building and I...I am slowly breaking. "I have a pencil." I finally speak out heroically.

"Really? Thanks! You're a life saver."

Yeah. I know I am. Because I'm a super hero. "Yep. No problem...." Dude, it's such a problem you have no idea. That's my favorite pencil, you better take care of it.

35 minutes later....

"Here, thanks for the pencil!"

Anytime, helpless little student.... "You're welcome." OMGSH YOU RIPPED PART OF THE GRIP TO MY PENCIL OFF. That's the last time you are ever going to see that pencil again...mark my words, punk.

BRIIIIIINNNNNGGG! Another emergency call.

So long Pencil Destructoider. We will meet again....

 

and when we do, bring your own pencil.

I mean seriously, how painful is that to accomplish? Not very, no, not at all.

I fly out, then up and up where I encounter a deep, and dark cave.....

named Economics.

The Cave of Economics.  It sounds scary, but on the contrary 'tis not, fearful internet surfer. Within the cave, there is a lonely, lonely man who sits on a stool and plays the fiddle.

Okay, maybe he doesn't play the fiddle, but he'd be 50 million times cooler if he did.

Instead, he's just a lonely man who sits on a stool and does the bare minimum of teaching! Oh, and in his spare time he plays with his Smart Board. Such a lonely man. Or just a very bored man...maybe if he actually TAUGHT then he wouldn't be bored....

but, YAY! We love not learning, don't we? Especially when we watch youtube videos instead!

Shhhh....gotta keep it on the hush-hush, we don't want The Titan Thumb finding out....aka the head honcho, aka our principalito!

"Morning class. So today we'll be talking about economics. and the economy. and economics...."

10 minutes into going absolutely nowhere.

"Anyone have some videos to youtube?"

Ooooo! That one! That one about the person who does that ridiculous thing they shouldn't have even thought of trying to do and ends up getting hurt, but it's so hysterical it just needed to posted for the whole world to see!

Or that one about.....*gasp!* There's a figure standing outside our door....the shadow fills the rectangular window, blocking out the natural florescent lighting from entering the classroom.

There's no mistaking the thumby shape.....

THE TITAN THUMB!!!

"Ummm...guys...." I try to warn the oblivious students and fiddle playing teacher. The doorknob begins to turn.... "NOOOOOO!!!!" I yell with all my might, leap from my seat, and rip out my giant pair of nail clippers.

I swing them around wildly in the view of the beast behind the door, and I can sense his hesistation as the doorknob flips back into place.  His shadow lessens as he backs away.  Soon he is out of sight.... I turn to my class, at first everyone is gaping with shock, but when they realize what has just happened, I am greeted with relentless cheers.

"Enough my peers. 'Twas only a cowardous beast. We shall no longer live in fear. As long as I'm around that is."

"Will you sign my nail clippers?!" A scream reaches my ears as I try to hold off the joyous crowd.

"Ew, no way, freak."  

The crowd becomes too much for me...I make an escape out the window and soar away as the class waves enthusiatically from within.

*Fades away from school scene*

That was me releasing my inner super hero. We all can with a bit of trust and pixie dust! So no matter who you are, relinquish your super hero, and set it loose upon your school to save it from complete disaster!!!

Thoughts on this blog? Maybe you hated it because you're a super villain. In that case- stay for some tea and we can chat about your broken childhood and how your parents never baked you those chocolate chip oatmeal cookies so now you've grown to be this detestable human being  reeking disaster everywhere.

Just Kidding.

OUT NOW YOU FIEND OR I WILL ZAP YOU WITH THIS PRETTY CHILL ZAPSTER.

Maybe you loved this blog because I taught you how to release your inner super hero.  

Actually...I just talked about it....never really "taught" you....just like my fiddle playing teach!

Well here: Don't think- just be the hero you are. Where ever you are, what ever you're doing- be the hero.

*Sniff* So touching....EAT THE PEANUT BUTTER COOKIE!

*Slips cookie slowly into mouth and munches suspiciously...*

Fo reals. Just take the cookie given to you and eat it. And if you're going to eat it, eat it with confidence. That's right you! Fix yo' posture.

Aight, my homies. I'll be back.....

KAPOW! BLAM! WHAM! ZAPPP! ZINGG! 

Beep!

Signing out of this blog like yeah-

Gwen the Super Hero, over and out.